duck dynasty
Did You Know the Media Calls Trump Racist Because They're Controlled By Satan?
In an interview with Breitbart News, Duck Dynasty patriarch confirmed something I've suspected ever since I sat through all eight episodes of NBC's "The Slap": the media is controlled by Satan. Wrapping up the week-long RNC shitshow in Cleveland, Breitbart;s Steve Bannon asked ...read more
Duck Dynasty Idiot Says We Were THIS CLOSE to Beating ISIS, But Your Vagina Ruined Everything
Apparently, Texas' abortion clinic TRAP laws had ISIS all boxed in and ready to stop killing Americans, until the Supreme Court went and gave them permission to keep right on killing us: They, on the day of that Supreme Court decision, they were jumping and hollering, they ...read more
Watch Duck Dynasty Bigot Offer Hilarious "Proof" That Jesus is Really Real
So, you all remember hateful idiot bigot homophobe Phil Robertson, right? He washed up at the Western Conservative Summit this weekend and was actually good for something for a change, regaling the crowd with this truly hilarious "proof" that Jesus is real: I guess that also ...read more
Duck Dynasty Star Backs Trump at Rally, Providing the Perfect Snapshot of American Politics in 2015
Donald Trump's campaign spent at least part of the weekend getting its ass handed to it on national television by 60 Minutes's Scott Pelley. But before the weekend even began, Trump was on the campaign trail letting America know by way of a cheap red hat that he's ready to make ...read more
Dear Phil Robertson: Just Come Out of the Closet Already
It's day 290 in the ongoing "Duck Dynasty: America's IQ Held Hostage" saga. You'll remember that just last week bearded, duck-calling Godfather Phil Robertson once again saw fit to grace us with his special brand of scripture-based backwater wisdom -- this time on the subject ...read more
During a Video Chat with Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson, Sarah Palin Admits She's "Simple Minded"
We can safely call it "The Summit of Stupid." To celebrate the Labor Day weekend, the Duck Dynasty cast traveled to Alaska for a very special cook-out with Sarah Palin and her family. Naturally, when such a gathering of unrivaled brain-power occurs, it only makes sense to ...read more
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PODCAST: Bob & Chez Discuss ISIS, Phil Robertson's Foreign Policy and Rand Paul's Flip-Floppery
Download the mp3 (54 minutes, 23mb) Gates of Hell: ISIS Beheads Another Journalist; Biden’s Gates of Hell Reaction; Glenn Greenwald Jokes About US Response to Beheaded Journalists; This is the Real Greenwald; Conspiracy Theorists Insist Obama is Giving ISIS Part of New Mexico; ...read more
Whoops! Christian 'Family Values' Congressman Caught on Video Cheating on Wife with Staffer
Rep. Vance McAllister (R-LA), who was elected on a family values, conservative Christian platform, was apparently caught on video by The Ouachita Citizen newspaper embracing and passionately kissing a female staffer, Melissa Peacock. McAllister has been married since 1997. The ...read more
Here's Why A&E Brought Phil Robertson Back So Quickly
Here's some news that will surprise absolutely no one who's been paying attention: A&E ended Phil Robertson's suspension from Duck Dynasty quickly because it realized that a metric ton of Twitter outrage wouldn't affect the show's bottom line one bit. According to a piece in ...read more
A Republican Congressman Is Bringing a Date from "Duck Dynasty" To the State of the Union Address
The newest must-have fashion statement for Republican members of Congress at the State of the Union Address is apparently a man-date. Last year Texas congressman, Twitter troll and unparalleled nut-job Steve Stockman brought Ted Nugent on his arm -- a guy who, remember, had ...read more
If You're Shocked By Duck Dynasty's Hillbilly Cosplay, Here's What 'Larry the Cable Guy' Used to Look Like
I wasn't surprised, nor did I care that the guys from Duck Dynasty are merely dressing up like hillbillies for the entertainment of their gullible television audience. Why? Because this has happened before. Here's alleged redneck Larry the Cable Guy when he used his real name ...read more
Reading Makes Sarah Palin's Head Hurt Real Bad
When Sarah Palin weighed in on the Duck Dynasty nonsense, she tweeted, "Free speech is an endangered species. Those ‘intolerants’ hatin’ and taking on the Duck Dynasty patriarch for voicing his personal opinion are taking on all of us." Uh-huh. Among other silliness, Palin ...read more
Bamboozled, Led Astray and Run-Amok: Reality Television, Celebrity Worship, and Why It Needs To Go Away but Won’t
“I almost protested the (Iraq War) in the beginning. Almost. Till I saw what happened to them Dixie Chicks. I said ‘Fuck that!’… But I’m like for real though why, why you care so much what the Dixie Chicks say? It’s not like they political scientists. They just bitches who ...read more
Phil Robertson Shouldn't Be Able To Hide Behind His Faith
Get ready for the angry Duck Dynasty boycotts to shift over to the market share A&E couldn't care less about. Entertainment Weekly is reporting that, as expected, the network will begin airing season four of its hugely popular show about inexplicably wealthy Deep South ...read more
Bill O'Reilly's Surprising Reaction to the 'Duck Dynasty' Fiasco
While interviewing Laura Ingraham on his Thursday night telecast, Bill O'Reilly actually condemned what Duck Dynasty performer Phil Robertson said about African Americans and the LGBT community. Eric Dolan from Raw Story reported: [Ingraham] said it was “disturbing” that ...read more
The Morning Banter: Phil Robertson's OTHER Awful Comment, the Hack List, Mix-a-Lot Revealed, and Hitch Plays Santa Claws
For most of you it's the last day before a very nice extended vacation. (For some of us it's just the usual Friday because the holidays don't mean we'll stop working for you, the seven or eight readers who'll still be around.) Anyway, here's some nonsense you can skim through ...read more
THE MORNING BANTER: NSA Limits, Duck Dynasty Bigots, Babies Falling From Burning Buildings, and Drake's Negotiation Skills
Now it's officially the day where you have to order those last couple things from Amazon. Here's what's happening on the interweb: 1. White House Panel Suggests Limits to NSA Snooping A presidential advisory panel has recommended sweeping limits on the government’s ...read more
Duck & Cover: A&E's Response To the "Duck Dynasty" Homophobia Scandal Is Such B.S.
A&E has some serious nerve putting Duck Dynasty patriarch Phil Robertson on "indefinite suspension" following a series of unbelievably homophobic comments he made during a newly published GQ interview. I don't say this because I think what Robertson said was acceptable or ...read more