Thursday evening, Donald Trump delivered another of his screech regattas, this time in Mike Pence’s home state of Indiana. We’re all familiar with his rallies as well as the all-too-familiar urge to hurl our televisions out the nearest window by the time he blurts the first of a few hundred roundelays of “this I can tell you,” but recently Trump has been adding more and more fiction to the already fictitious proceedings.
Recently, Trump’s been talking about his foolish decision to recognize Jerusalem as the capital of Israel. You might recall when he first announced the policy — he was barely able to form words due to something horrendously wrong with his mouth. We still don’t know what the problem was, and Dr. Ronny Jackson’s explanation that it was a nasal decongestant barely explains why Trump couldn’t even say the words “United States” without badly slurring it.
During his most recent handful of rallies, the president retold a story about signing the order to recognize Jerusalem as the capital — a scene, mind you, that was captured on video. In Trump’s telling of the story, he pauses midway through signing the order when he hears how much the embassy will cost. So, he says, he crossed out his name on the executive order and demanded a better quote on the project. It turns out he and his ambassador to Israel, David Friedman (formerly a bankruptcy lawyer who worked for Trump’s ex-attorney Mark Kasowitz), decided they can build the embassy for just $150,000.
Yes, that’s one hundred fifty thousand — not million and definitely not billion. Here’s video proof:
Trump puffs himself up for being so frugal in choosing a site for the embassy in Israel. (He's told this story like four times at different events, and it still barely makes sense.) pic.twitter.com/MbBUGA8ifM
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) May 11, 2018
Okay, bear in mind that none of that actually happened because we have the entire scene on video (“…and God bless the United Sssshashh”). But Trump keeps telling his Red Hat army that he plans to build the embassy for roughly the same price as a two bedroom condo in a rural suburb. Forget physical security in the face of terrorism. Forget the all-import cyber security that’ll need to be installed. Trump is so determined to reinforce his horseshit brand as a deal-maker that he’s promising something that’s almost literally impossible without putting the embassy, and the United States, in significant danger.
Naturally, however, the Red Hats thought it was the greatest thing the world. Indeed, they even gave a standing ovation to Trump’s description of how he correctly spelled his first name on the signature line of the order. This demographic of impotent, easily-deceived nincompoops blindly accepts as truth everything and anything that Trump farts out of his overly articulated yapper.
Earlier in his rally, Trump again repeated how we’re all allowed to say “Merry Christmas” again now that he’s president. More wild cheering. It’s baffling given how there was never a law or anything else linked to President Obama or any government agency regarding the use of “Merry Christmas.” Obama himself said nothing about it. If several corporations decided it’d be better for sales to say “Happy Holidays” or similar, well, it’s the free market. Corporations, we’re told, should be allowed to do whatever is best for profit margins, shareholders and employees. No one — not Obama or anyone else ordered Kmart or Macy’s to stop saying “Merry Christmas.” No one. Likewise, nothing Trump has done has somehow reversed this nonexistent rule/law.
It’s entirely a figment of the imaginations of Fox News viewers and the Red Hats. Why? Because they’ll believe any bullshit they hear as long as it comes from either Fox News or Trump himself — even if it’s completely ludicrous, like the imaginary $150,000 embassy or the imaginary lifting of the imaginary ban on “Merry Christmas.”
Yet they refuse to believe 98 percent of climate scientists who agree that human-made global warming is real, even as it destroys their neighborhoods. They refuse to believe the AMA which confirmed that fetuses don’t feel pain until the 27th week of pregnancy. They don’t believe the Congressional Budget Office when it releases a scoring that’s unfavorable to Trump. And they refuse to believe the Republican-led intelligence community assessment about the Russian attack on our elections. They only believe the shrieking grifter who does nothing but lie to them about his presidency, his accomplishments, his failures and his malfeasance — all this despite a 40 year track record of lies and deception. Hell, they’ll even take Trump’s side when he and his administration bash the military service of a Vietnam War hero like John McCain.
And we’re supposed to reach out to these people? Based on what?
When Michael J. Fox in The American President analogizes how citizens lost in the desert are so starved for leadership, they’ll drink the sand, he and screenwriter Aaron Sorkin couldn’t have known that in 2018 nearly every Red Hat disciple of Trump is drinking the sand and loving every disgusting, gritty handful.