Conspiracy Theorist Alex Jones Says Boston Bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev Was “Totally Set Up”

There’s a maxim in the entertainment business: beat it to death if it succeeds. And no one can beat something to death quite like flimflam artist Alex Jones who continues to market the conspiracy theory that the Boston Marathon Bombing was faked. Indeed, every mass shooting or national tragedy is a false flag conspiracy in the addled mind of Jones and his legion of flying psychomonkeys — including, by the way, his chief goon Dan Bidondi who made a name for himself by shouting “false flag!” at several of the Boston Marathon press conferences.

On Wednesday, one of the two suspects in the bombing, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, was found guilty on all 30 counts for his involvement in the bombing — a tragedy on American soil rivaled only by Sandy Hook and 9/11. From here, deliberations will begin as to whether Tsarnaev will receive the death penalty.

And guess who rushed to Tsarnaev’s defense? Alex Jones, of course.

Uh, the Tsarnaev living brother, convicted in the Boston Marathon bombing said he was not guilty, but they’ve actually cut his larynx out.

Well, he plead not guilty. And the thing about his larynx being cut out is also an unproved conspiracy theory that has something to do with Israeli doctors evidently trying to silence Tsarnaev — stupidly, since he could presumably enter a written testimony if he chose to do so. The truth is, once Tsarnaev had recovered from his wounds inflicted during the manhunt, he was extensively questioned. I mean, has Alex Jones ever spoken a single sentence that doesn’t have a huge stinking turd of a lie in there?

And then his lawyer came out and said he was guilty on the news a few weeks ago. Boy, with defense lawyers like that.

No, she said it in an opening statement in a strategy to get a deal to avoid the death penalty. Tsarnaev’s lawyer, Judy Clarke, used the same strategy when she defended Jared Lee Loughner, the shooter in the Tucson massacre, and it worked that time. Hence the reason why Tsarnaev plead guilty but whose lawyer admitted his guilt. That’s all. There’s no plot here. But Alex Jones has a massive financial fortune to supplement, so…

Anyway, here it comes.

He was totally set up, ladies and gentlemen, to sell the police state. His brother worked for the CIA. The Russians blew his cover two years before. The government lied about it. It all came out.

No, no it didn’t all come out. The only legitimate tie to the CIA was that the daughter of Agent Graham Fuller was married briefly to Tsarnaev’s Uncle Ruslan. That’s it. Nothing else. Actually, correction: it all came out — out of Alex Jones’ ass.

Unbelievable. And we have the Secret Service, even though Obama wasn’t in town, come to press conferences with our reporter there [Bidondi] — you saw it on national news — we’re gonna do a recap of that tonight on the nightly news, Dan Bidondi, and tell him and tell the press, do not look at this material, do not look at this (sic) pictures of the, the, the contractors in the black backpacks.

There’s no evidence or press accounts of the Secret Service being on the ground after the bombing, nor is there evidence that the Secret Service intimidated Dan Bidondi and instructed him not to look at pictures of alleged contractors. Bidondi might say otherwise, but Bidondi also thinks the crow and the seagull that attacked the Pope’s doves last year was a biblical message about the end of the world (the crow represented the U.N. evidently). Bidondi and InfoWars, by the way, also thought a fake news story about a Common Core teacher instructing children about how to use a dildo was real.

And I’m not saying the contractors were involved. There was a drill, we know. It was on the news. They ran a drill so they could get in whoever really did it in case they got caught, then they’re part of the drill.

The drill thing is bullshit, too. There were bomb-sniffing dogs on the ground, but that happens at all sorts of big events since 9/11 and other terror attacks. Another similar conspiracy theory involves a tweet that went out from the Boston Globe Twitter account saying there was going to be a controlled explosion on Boylston Street. This is the “drill” Jones is talking about, but there were suspicious packages reported on multiple occasions after the original bombing, and the police were disposing of those packages, hence the controlled explosions. The theory also goes that the tweet went out before the bombing occurred. Turns out it was a timezone thing and the person who captured the tweet lived in an earlier time zone. (Here’s a fantastic debunking of this drill nonsense.)

We know it was fake.

But he just said “whoever really did it.” So, a bomb really went off, killing and injuring a lot of people, right? How could it be fake? Nevertheless, it’s clear that Jones thinks Tsarnaev didn’t do it.

The other Tsarnaev brother was murdered in front of everybody. He didn’t kill a cop. It all came out.

No it didn’t. He’s making that up. Tamerlan Tsarnaev wasn’t convicted of killing the Massachusetts Institute of Technology because Tamerlan was killed in the shootout, and his body was run over by Dzhokhar as he sped away from the scene.

I don’t know what happened, but it’s fake. He’s now been convicted.

Okay, so first Jones tells us specifically that it was a false flag operation in which U.S. military contractors wearing black backpacks staged a drill then allowed the real bomber to get into position, and that during the manhunt, Tamerlan Tsarnaev didn’t kill a cop. But he doesn’t know what happened.

There’s a popular phrase among Christian, especially those who don’t believe in evolution: God is in the gaps. Alex Jones exploits the paranoia of his devout fanboys with the idea that the conspiracy is in the gaps. Wherever there’s a loose end (reference to the 9/11 Truther movie not intended) the loose end must be where the conspiracy is exposed, and Jones aims directly for it. There difference though is that whenever there aren’t any gaps, Jones manufactures some. He’ll routine claim to have evidence — evidence in the form of poorly reported articles from his own website. Or he’ll take another rumor from the conspiracy underground and blow it up into his own theory.

A lot of times, it’s entertaining to watch how wildly Jones flails around a story, and I’ve noticed that the louder he yells, the more wrong he is. However, when it comes to the Boston Marathon bombing and especially the Sandy Hook massacre, Jones routinely craps all over the memories of those who died, while brutally insulting those who survived. This is truly unforgivable.

Bob Cesca is the host of the Bob Cesca Show podcast, a twice weekly political talk show. He’s also a contributor to Follow him on Twitter and on Facebook.