Rand Paul Is Slowly and Epically Trolling Michelle Obama About Donuts

Senator and presidential hopeful Rand Paul’s (R-Ky.) genius plan to reach out to black voters seems to have entered into a new phase, one in which he trolls America’s immensely popular first black First Lady on Twitter, but only once a month. Michelle Obama has become a potent symbol of right-wing rage at, among other things, eating your vegetables, and so with that apparently in mind, Paul tweeted the following burn at Mrs. Obama:

Now, a normal person would look at that and go “The fuck?” but those of us familiar with the Republican base’s revulsion at all things Michelle Obama instantly recognize this as a shot at the First Lady’s  completely voluntary “Let’s Move” program to get kids to exercise and eat healthy through tyranny and fascism, obviously. Mrs. Obama has also supported healthier school lunches, which obviously means we will now be outlawing donuts.

In case that picture and mention are too cryptic, though, just scroll back almost exactly four weeks on Paul’s Twitter feed, and you’ll find this more on-the-nose shot:

So, it appears that Rand Paul is going to torture Michelle Obama to madness with a slow drip of Rand Paul donut porn. With the next new moon, expect to see an Instagram of Paul planking on a display case at Tim Horton’s, or maybe shooting at a turnip in front of Krispy Kreme.

Again, to the uneducated, Paul’s tweets might seem innocuous, maybe even a little bit playful, but the resentment he’s tapping into is not only tragically stupid, it is even more rabid and ugly than the hostility directed at her husband. For a guy who’s supposed to be broadening his party’s appeal, he sure seems to be playing to an awfully narrow set of cheap seats.