Ted Nugent evidently is on Facebook, where he enjoys posting cat videos and click-bait questionnaires determining which historical bigot you are (“I got Nathan Bedford Forrest!”). Actually, I have no idea whether he posts those things, but it’s funny to imagine him squatting in his Doomsday Bunker, wearing footy pajamas while whining on Facebook about how much the new Messenger app sucks.
There are three things about his Facebook that we know for sure: 1) He threatened to assassinate the president, along with other top Democratic leaders, 2) As much as he despises these Democrats, he doesn’t know how to spell several of their names, and 3) He’s hilariously illiterate. Take the following status update, posted yesterday:
GUNRIGHTS HERO PROFESSOR JOHN LOTT blew the freedom haters & gungrabbers outta the water with his stats/facts broadside MORE GUNS = LESS CRIME suckerpunch truth bludgeon. Read the book, share the truth with your elected officials & give away as many books to as many people as you can to de-sheeple the braindead masses with their peace&love disease. Make a donatoin to the CRIME PREVENTION RESEARCH CENTER to destroy the Obama/Holder/Clinton/Schumer/Pilosi/Boxer/Feinstein/Durbin/Bloomburgh propaganda jihad against our right to self-defense & TRTKABA. JOIN THE NRA! Be the best American you can be. Freedom or their evil carcasses for traction back to it.
Chez Pazienza and I spend a lot of time relentlessly pecking at the InfoWars goon, Dan Bidondi. But Nugent almost tops him with crazy run-on sentences and obvious misspellings. Right off the bat, “suckerpunch truth bludgeon?” If Nugent likes “PROFESSOR JOHN LOTT,” then saying that he suckerpunched the gungrabbers isn’t necessarily a good thing. Suckerpunching is a cheap-shot. It’s what cowards do.
Next up, what’s a “donatoin?” For that matter, who the hell are “Pilosi” and “Bloomburgh?” If you claim to know enough about a politician to understand their positions on issues that are important to you, you’d think the correct spelling of their names would come naturally.
Last but not least, the death threat. Not only did Nugent threaten the life of the president, but also the lives of the House minority leader, the former Secretary of State, the current Attorney General, the senior U.S. senator from New York, the entire California delegation to the U.S. Senate, the senior U.S. senator from Illinois and the former mayor of New York City. “Freedom or their evil carcasses for traction back to it.” I assume this means he and his supporters plan to kill these leaders and use their carcasses as traction to drive out of mud puddles or deep snow, which is, I don’t know, evil but creative? Never heard that one before, but okay.
Bottom line: how many more times will the Secret Service have to visit Mr. Nugent before they finally book him?
One more thing. Pro tip, Ted. Facebook has an “edit” button now.