I’ve been a big fan of yours since I was watching Fresh Prince of Bel-Air reruns before school on TBSand after school on Fox. Every time my mom and I went to SYMS (usually when it was raining because #RainSale) to buy a blazer, I begged for one with a fun inner lining so that I could wear it inside-out like you.
And when the time came for you to be a father, I was really ready to give Jaden a chance.
I know you know he probably should have been kept away from the spotlight a few more years, but I know you know how hungry he must be to get out there. You were young when you started and look how you turned out, right?
But you were always that kid from West Philadelphia (born and raised). Jaden was born in Malibu, California, the infinitely deep epicenter of shallowness.
And honestly, I can forgive his “craziness”; the kid is 15 for Christ’s sake. If someone gave me a platform to speak and recorded every single word I said when I was that age, there’d be a lot worse things than this coming out of my mouth/Twitter handle:
If Everybody In The World Dropped Out Of School We Would Have A Much More Intelligent Society.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) September 13, 2013
If Newborn Babies Could Speak They Would Be The Most Intelligent Beings On Planet Earth.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) September 12, 2013
You Can Discover Everything You Need To Know About Everything By Looking At Your Hands
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) May 10, 2014
But last weekend, Jaden did something inexcusable; not because it was “insane” or even offensive. It was just rude.
This is not okay:
Yes, that is your son in a white Batman costume. I wish I was kidding.
This was someone’s wedding day, and they deserve the right to be the only one wearing white (even if they might not be that pure…). That’s Wedding Etiquette 101.
And since I know you probably don’t keep up to date with SNL anymore, I’m sure Jaden explained that this is a reference to the the “Kimye Talk Show” skit in which Kanye/Jay Pharoah says he designed his wedding outfit and it’s going to be a Batman costume with a white mask. But that doesn’t make it okay, it makes it that much more annoying (no one wants to be reminded about how weird this season of SNL has felt).
Not only that, according to Page Six, Jaden was apparently “batting glasses to the ground and being a general nuisance at the ceremony. Vogue Italia‘s editor in chief Franca Sozzani was getting irritated because he kept coming up behind her and throwing his cape over her head.” He also photobombed some people who deserve the right to be seen celebrate true love in peace.
Holy pestering progeny Batman…
Look, I know there are countless articles and tweets and message-board posts lambasting your son for being the out-of-touch dumbass that he is/most 15-year olds are, so it’s easy to discredit them all and not do anything about him, and “Stand Up, Shake Hands, Say ‘How Do You Do'”-style manners may have gone out fashion a long time ago, but it’s your job to at least teach him the kind of common courtesy good manners that never go out of style.
Unlike a White Batman suit, which is really a one-use kind of thing.