The GOP Tries and Fails to Pander to Hipster Millennials

A few months ago, the GOP had a lot of fun at the expense of an ill-conceived web advertisement featuring a pajamas-clad, irony-embracing, man-child Millennial hipster, smirking and sipping hot cocoa.

I’ll be the first to admit that the “Get Covered” campaign stepped into a fastball on that one and deservingly got beaned in the head. There’s nothing quite as cringe-worthy as trying way too hard to be “cool” by transparently pandering to the most conspicuous trends of the day. And nothing radiates desperation more than when a PR campaign releases an ad that amounts to a modern, insufferably-Millennial edition of “Poochie the Dog” from The Simpsons.

So the Republicans went to town against Pajamas Boy with an onslaught of memes and obnoxious snickering.

Yet here we are in March, with Pajamas Boy memes still circulating in the GOP zeitgeist, and the Republican Party just stepped into the same pitch, pandering to Millennials with a “we’re sooo with the kids” viral video of a doughy, unshaven Millennial wearing hipster glasses and, yes, a leather biker jacket. Evidently, this is a real guy named “Scott Greenberg.”

I’ll give them a sliver of credit for not having the kid turn to the camera and say, “SMH. Making this video is totes boring. #Sigh.”

As for the content of the spot, “Scott” explains that his fellow Millennials can barely afford to put gas in (their parents’) car, and so he supports an “all of the above” energy policy.

Well, Scott, I’m not sure how wind or solar energy will help you to afford a tank of gas tomorrow, and, sorry to say, wind turbines won’t fit on the roof of your Dad’s Buick Enclave.

Also, if this is really your pet issue, surely you’ve heard the following quotes:

“I believe we need an all-of-the-above strategy.”

“This country needs an all-out, all-of-the-above strategy that develops every available source of American energy, a strategy that’s cleaner, cheaper and full of new jobs.”

“[I have] a real strategy to take control of our energy future and finally reduce our dependence on foreign oil—an all-of-the-above approach to developing all our energy resources.”

“Thanks in part to our all-of-the-above strategy for American energy,” the United States generates “more natural gas than anybody.”

“The all-of-the-above energy strategy I announced a few years ago is working, and today, America is closer to energy independence than we’ve been in decades.”

Those are all quotes from President Obama, who’s clearly to blame for Scott’s and other Millennials’ inability to afford a tank of gas, what with his all-of-the-above energy policy. By the way, this is one of several areas where I strongly disagree with the president. Our entire energy strategy should be focused on diverting all available research and resources to a moon-race level effort to discover affordable, clean, renewable energy. But there it is: all-of-the-above energy including coal, natural gas, oil and alternatives, which is not unlike including leeches, suction cups and blood-letting in a cancer-treatment strategy.

Meanwhile, Scott and his peers, while evidently incapable of paying for gas (thanks, Obama!), are actually increasing their spending on luxury items more than any other demographic. Indeed, Millennials increased spending on big ticket items like fashion, jewelry and technology by upwards of 33 percent. In a distant second are baby boomers with around a ten percent pop in post-recession spending.

And so we get an hilariously ridiculous video from the “personal responsibility” party, which clearly blames everyone, especially the Democrats (whose leader supports the exact same energy policy as Millennial Scott), for the fact that Scott can’t afford basic necessities such as gas. Everyone’s to blame for Scott’s poverty except Scott. If he was truly a “maker” and not a “taker,” he’d go out an find a better-paying job instead of leeching from his parents and the system. [End snark.]