THE MORNING BANTER: Lost Jets, 4.2 Obamacarers, Hangover Talkshows, and Keith Richards’ Children’s Book

Happy Wednesday. I think we’re going to make it. Here’s what’s happening on the interweb:

1. Malaysia Not Sure Which Way Lost Jet Was Headed

More than four days after a Malaysian jetliner went missing en route to Beijing, authorities acknowledged Wednesday they didn’t know which direction the plane carrying 239 passengers was heading when it disappeared, vastly complicating efforts to find it. It also rules out the infamous “Where Were You The Last Time You Saw It?” technique from being used.

2. More Than 4.2 Million People Have Now Enrolled In Obamacare

More than 4.2 million people enrolled into private plans via Obamacare’s health insurance exchange marketplaces through March 1, the Department of Health and Human Services announced in a report Tuesday. Which is…good?…I guess…

But speaking of…

3. Barack Obama Was On “Between Two Ferns With Zach Galifianakis”

“How does it feel to be the last black president?”

4. Keith Richards Is Writing a Children’s Book. Yes, a Children’s Book.

Little, Brown Books for Young Readers announced on Tuesday that it would publish Mr. Richards’s Gus & Me: The Story of My Granddad and My First Guitar, as both a hardcover book with a CD and an ebook on Sept. 9. In the book Mr. Richards, 70, will revisit some of the childhood memories he tapped while writing Life, which makes sense, when you realize kids are pretty much just tiny drunk adults.