THE MORNING BANTER: Cable Monopolies, Yankee Retirements, Cancer Graphs, and Radiohead Video Games

Most of the East Coast is covered in snow and terrified. Here’s what’s happening on the interweb:

1. Comcast to Buy Time Warner Cable

Comcast is set to buy Time Warner Cable in an all-stock deal, CNBC’s David Faber reported Wednesday night. Faber shared the news on Twitter, announcing that the deal would be made on Thursday morning. The reported acquisition will be for about $159 a share. A small price to pay to be one step closer to collecting all the Infinity Gems.

2. Derek Jeter Announces Retirement

Derek Jeter officially announced his retirement after the 2014 season. He did so via a Facebook post thats comment section was surprisingly filled with divisive remarks about his skills as a baseball player, his propensity to tell or not tell the truth, and his sexual preferences.

3. Interactive Graph Shows All The Cancer You’re Going To Get

A biotechnologist named David Taylor published a handy interactive graphic that illustrates how common and deadly various types of cancer are. Each pie chart represents an organ and is sized according to the incidence of cancer of that organ. Now you don’t even need WebMd to confirm that that thing you were worried about is probably definitely cancer!

4. Radiohead Mobile Game Is A Beautiful Explorable Fantasyland

Radiohead has released a mobile game that explores its music in a hypnotic alien sandbox-style setting, based on recording sessions from its most recent album. This is how to disappear completely and never be found.

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