Ed Snowden Snubbed for Person of the Year, Glenn Greenwald Predictably Freaks Out

Pope Francis was chosen as TIME magazine’s Person of the Year, with fugitive NSA leaker Edward Snowden ranking as Runner Up. And so, Glenn Greenwald, Snowden’s media flack and former blogger for The Guardian, reacted with his usual grace and dignity.

Strike that. Silly of me. Predictably, Greenwald pitched a sour-grapes tantrum about it, protesting via Twitter and telling TPM’s Tom Kludt:

“It’s a meaningless award from a meaningless magazine, designed to achieve the impossible: to make TIME relevant and interesting for a few fleeting moments.”

But, naturally, had Snowden been named Person of the Year, the high honor, for which Greenwald has been lobbying in the name of Snowden, would’ve carried deep meaning about the world’s disgust over the U.S.’s vast and pernicious security state. TIME would’ve become the gold standard for print journalism and, a week from now, Greenwald would’ve popped-off a 10,000 word article for TIME about Lichtenstein eavesdropping on the Dutch in 2003 — based, of course, on a stolen NSA document courtesy of Snowden’s monumental sacrifice to liberty. However, since Snowden didn’t win, TIME magazine is worthless and cowardly.

In an email to TPM, Greenwald acknowledged Pope Francis’ “pronouncements” but then continued to bash TIME:

“If it were a serious magazine with minimally brave editors, then of course Snowden would have been chosen, but I never expected him to be precisely because that’s not what TIME is.”

I’m actually a little disappointed that Greenwald didn’t proclaim a new vendetta against the publication, likely in Portuguese so he could deny it later (bad translation) — And now I will make it my life’s work to expose TIME’s fealty to Obama and extrajudicial eavesdropping. I will use any means necessary including hacking, theft of documents and Pierre Omidyar’s vast and pernicious fortune to make you pay, TIME magazine. Oh yes. You will pay for your apparent lack of vision. Poopy heads.

By the way, “Edgy?” 1998 called, Glenn. Sheesh. TIME wasn’t “outside the envelope” enough for you? Yes, choosing a transformational world leader who could significantly change the course of Catholicism in the name of outreach, equality and social justice is the antithesis of “edgy, bold, courageous and innovative.”

Sorry, Glenn, while Snowden was the story of the Summer, Americans stopped caring about him sometime in mid-August. Meanwhile, Pope Francis, on the other hand, is an unimpeachable man of good deeds and ongoing high esteem who didn’t hack and steal and flee to Russia, a nation, by the way, which represents many of the things the pope has recently denounced.

Bob Cesca is the host of the Bob Cesca Show podcast, a twice weekly political talk show. He’s also a contributor to Salon.com. Follow him on Twitter and on Facebook.