Why We Should All Be Grateful For Walmart This Thanksgiving

Let’s say you work at Walmart (I know I know, but just go with me on this one).

You most likely make somewhere in the area of $25,000 a year.

Everyday, your life is a manifested version of People of Walmart.

You’re forced to read articles about how Costco employees make an average wage of $21 per hour, receive company-sponsored health insurance, have the chance for upward mobility, and even get Thanksgiving Day off.

Meanwhile, your employer has told you not only will be you working on Thanksgiving, even though Walmart workers protested at stores in 46 states during Thanksgiving and Black Friday last year, but you will be dealing with Black Friday sales starting even earlier on Thanksgiving Day…which is Thursday.

You’re already breaking your back working a dead-end job for a company that doesn’t give a shit about you, but now they want more…

An Ohio Walmart recently placed a handful of large brightly-colored bins in employee breakrooms with a sign attached asking for the employees to, “Please donate food items here so Associates [what they call their employees] can enjoy Thanksgiving Dinner.” (pic above)

So yeah, if you could just help those poor, disenfranchised co-workers of yours that are making a measly $25,000 by donating some food that you bought with your measly $25,000, that would be great

If you don’t have any extra canned goods lying around, you can always just donate to The Associates in Critical Need Trust, which is funded by Walmart employee contributions that can be deducted straight from your paycheck.

And if you find it at all disconcerting that Walmart is pulling a Thanksgiving version of “Let Them Eat Cake,” Walmart spokesman Kory Lundberg would like to point out to you that this program “is for associates who have had some hardships come up.

You know, hardships…

…like having to work at Walmart….

Now give thanks and a can of creamed corn or you’re fired.