Sad Readers Weigh In On The Departure Of Chez Pazienza

Our readers have been understandably distraught after the departure of our feature writer Chez Pazienza. They have written to our Facebook group, email and Twitter accounts pleading for us to bring him back to the Banter. We have fond memories of Chez and we would hate for his reputation to be sullied by his excessive use of cocaine and flagrant plagiarism. 

So, in order to give him a dignified send off, we’ve compiled some of the best comments from readers

on our post detailing why we fired him



Hi everyone –

It is with a heavy heat that I found the out about the departure of Chez Pazienza from The Daily Banter. Chez has written for the site since their relaunch in early 2012 and has provided them with many great stories, original pieces, and provocative opinions. Unfortunately they discovered that Chez had plagiarized a supposedly “exclusive” Rand Paul speech, posted here yesterday.

Now, I’m not sure what caused the Daily Banter to release Chez, but apparently while the alleged speech sounded like the normal word salad one would expect from someone like Rand Paul, upon closer inspection they realized that elements of it had in fact been taken directly, without attribution, from Neil Diamond’s Hello Again, the opening line of Jean Rhys’s Wide Sargasso Sea, Quint’s speech from Jaws, Rand Paul’s Wikipedia page, The Beatles’ I Am the Walrus, Breaking Bad, Fatal Attraction, Jayson Blair, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J.K. Rowling, Butters’s speech about lying on South Park, the Wikipedia page on Plagiarism, French writer Michel Houellebecq’s comments after being accused of plagiarizing lines from Wikipedia in 2010, Whitney Houston’s It’s Not Right, The Bible (Psalms 6:10), Kafka’s The Trial, The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, Animal House,Apollo 13, President Whitmore’s rallying speech in Independence Day, I Won’t Back Down by Tom Petty, the opening lines of The Godfather, Maya Angelou, Charles Manson, the closing line in The Great Gatsby, Miley Cyrus’s We Can’t Stop, the Avis Car Rental slogan, the Coen Brothers’ Blood Simple, Howard Beale in Network, I’ll Stand by You by The Pretenders, The Jackson 5′s I’ll Be There, I’m Your Man by Leonard Cohen, an entry called “Advice for the Falsely Accused” on Dr. Phil’s website, Look Into Your Heart by Roxette (or Miller’s Crossing, we’re not sure), Barry Goldwater’s campaign slogan, Looney Toons, and Chevy Chase’s sign-off on Saturday Night Live‘s “Weekend Update.”

In fact, it turns out the entire thing was plagiarized from start to finish. Honestly, they’re not quite sure how, or why he did it, but they’re pretty sure it involved illicit drugs.

I hope nothing Mr. Pazienza but all the best for his future endeavors and hopes another outlet will forgive his journalist transgressions so he can continue to pursue his passion for writing.



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What do you expect from a bunch of hacks and haters?

And I’ll point out that EVERY WORD they wrote was a direct steal from the Oxford English Dictionary.

Craig Moffitt:

Is this a joke?


I really hope you aren’t serious. Bob and Chez carry this site, and Chez’s post was clearly a joke.

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H/t to formerlywhatithink

Sam Doloncot:

Fuck that guy. He was a misogynistic asshole anyway.

In other related news, The Daily Banter is actively looking for a replacement. We’ve had multiple prominent applications and should shortly be announcing a new writer.

Stay tuned!

Ben Cohen is the editor and founder of The Daily Banter. He lives in Washington DC where he does podcasts, teaches Martial Arts, and tries to be a good father. He would be extremely disturbed if you took him too seriously.