Brazil To Declare War on the U.S. (or Today’s Glenn Greenwald Fever Dream)

It would be easy to call Glenn Greenwald a libertarian nihilist who detests and distrusts all forms of government, and if that were the case I might at least respect him for his intellectual honesty in standing firm on his principles. But the reality is that he’s only hostile toward one government, the government he considers irredeemably criminal due to the original sin of its two-party system. This is why he regularly attacks the United States for the same infractions committed by dozens and dozens of other countries worldwide while conveniently overlooking those other offenders or brushing off their trespasses as inconsequential.

And while a few of the nations Greenwald tends to either embrace or ignore expose his hypocrisy in the most comically conspicuous way possible — places like China and Russia, whose omnipresent, often totalitarian governments make the U.S. look like the Land of Oz — only one highlights his lack of aversion to straight-up old school, this-for-that corruption. That country is Brazil, the one he currently calls home and the one that recently stepped up to provide federally funded security for him and his husband, David Miranda — just days after, of course, he dipped into his bag of Edward Snowden-provided goodies and handed over to Brazil classified information which showed that the NSA had at one time intercepted the communications of Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff.

Just days before deciding to play Santa Claus to Brazil, Greenwald had sworn vengeance against the U.S. and Britain for having the gall to detain his husband because he was transporting stolen classified material through the U.K. for Greenwald and The Guardian. I bring this up lest you think, despite the already obvious conflict of interest, that Greenwald was helping his adopted home country out of the goodness of his heart. He wasn’t, not entirely; he was doing it more to twist the knife on the United States.

And that he did. In the few weeks since Greenwald petulantly put his hands in the sandbox and threw sand everywhere just because he was having a tantrum over being personally slighted, Dilma Rousseff has canceled a high-profile state visit to the United States scheduled for next month and now, at the U.N. today, she went on an outraged diatribe against the U.S. because, according to her, espionage among supposedly friendly nations is “totally unacceptable.” This is, of course, nonsense of the highest order. Almost all countries spy on each other in one form or another, friendly or not, and to believe otherwise is laughably naive. Still, here’s Rouseff bringing the indignation:

Meddling in such a manner in the lives and affairs of other countries is a breach of international law and, as such, it is an affront to the principles that should otherwise govern relations among countries, especially among friendly nations.

What’s worth noting here is how far Greenwald and Snowden strayed from their own bullshit by suddenly deciding to expose the U.S.’s foreign spying. You’ll remember when all this first started, the supposed reason for Snowden’s outrage over what our government was doing had nothing to do with outside monitoring — which is a vital part of successful diplomacy and war-avoidance, by the way — and everything to do with the evils of spying on your own people. (This is a good time to again mention that Snowden is currently in Russia.) But then, when it became politically convenient or when the mood struck them, it became about spying internationally, spying in general. And here’s what it’s all wrought. This crap. This purposely embarrassing public controversy over something everyone on the world stage knows about but no one acknowledges. Expressing disgust over being spied on is nothing more than large-scale Kabuki.

Especially when you’re doing it yourself.

Oh well. It’s not like we need to worry about war with Brazil. And I’m sure we can arrange an information swap where we give them back all the futbol secrets, samba steps, and caipirinha recipes we inadvertently stole.

Chez Pazienza was the beating heart of The Daily Banter, sadly passing away on February 25, 2017. His voice remains ever present at the Banter, and his influence as powerful as ever.