by David Glenn Cox
I hate those teaser headlines that never actually achieve what they
promise so I’ll tell you up front, I don’t know why he was fired. But
what I do know tells me it wasn’t for the reasons given to the public.
If the White House were to fire all the staffers who had called
Republicans assholes, Obama would be working alone in the White House.
a petition calling for a further investigation into 9-11? Lets see,
name your three favorite investigations done by the Bush Administration
that you felt were done admirably and above reproach. You see, it very
quickly becomes the Washington version of Clue.
ignore the asshole remark and you apologize, saying that you
misunderstood the full intent of the petition, and everyone goes back
to work. So for Mr. Jones to get fired so quickly and so stealthily it
becomes obvious that there is more to the picture than meets the eye.
Jones’s efforts as co-founder of the group ColorofChange.org, which had
led to the cancellation of over fifty advertisers on the Glenn Beck
program, is definitely fuel for the fire. So was it Mr. Murdoch in the
back alley with an innuendo? I know it wasn’t Beck himself, he’s such a
spineless jellyfish I bet he walks the other way when he sees Bill
O’Reilly in the hall. Weasels don’t fight, they whine to their boss.
Beck has been whining about Jones and taking shots at him on his show,
shots that mainly go over the heads of the attentive troglodytes in the
Considering that Jones has only been in office as an
advisor on “Green Jobs” for a few months you can eliminate malfeasance
as he hasn’t been in office long enough to hold cocaine-fueled parties
with hookers hired as day workers as was done by the Bush Forest
Service employees. Nor has he been in office long enough to pass out no
bid multi-million dollar contracts to companies where he has a monetary
investment or family members on the payroll, as was done in the Bush
administration. So if it’s not professional it must be personal, but
remember this is Washington. DUIs? Forget it, too common. If it were
something that mundane Jones would just step down to spend more time
with his family.
For generations it was common to push people
from office by threatening to expose to the public that they were gay.
Today in politics that is nonsense, you can only be removed for being
gay after running for office as a staunch anti-gay activist, and even
then you’d be removed for being a hypocrite and not for being gay.
in the closet perhaps? Incriminating photos maybe of Jones holding a
bong and partying with Mike Tyson or walking dogs with Michael Vick?
Again, this is Washington; substance abuse is as common as cracks in
the sidewalk. The numbers there would be like going to a Bush cabinet
meeting and asking, “Raise your hand if you dodged the draft with
Limbaugh, two felony arrests, Cindy McCain,
felony forgery and theft, but this is Washington, debauchery’s
playground. Any accusations like that would be met with one of ours for
one of yours. So it is unlikely to be moral turpitude. Then what does
Jones say in his own defense?
“They are using lies and
distortions to distract and divide.” Thank you, Dr. Obvious. That is
the Republican game plan from day one, so the question we need to ask
is, why did it work in this case. Jones cited a “vicious smear
campaign,” which points back to Fox, and maybe the skeletons are not in
Mr. Jones’s closet but someone higher up and Mr. Jones is just being a
good soldier and falling on the grenade for a superior officer, ala
Mr. Jones has already apologized for calling
Republicans assholes and regrets signing the petition. No drugs, no
breach of fiduciary responsibilities, no ladies or boys accosted or
deflowered, and yet Jones is out on his ass without even so much as a
ride to the bus station. Considering the weekend termination and Mr.
Jones’s hostility, it doesn’t sound like the good soldier scenario is
very likely, unless he was an unwitting good soldier and was thrown on
Indiana Representative Mike Pence, chairman of the
House Republican conference, said Jones’s “extremist views and coarse
rhetoric have no place in this administration or the public debate. Van
Jones should resign his position and if he is unwilling to do so, the
president should demand his resignation.”
That’s just plain
funny. The previous administration had a vice president that told
elected members to “Fuck Off” on the floor of the House, and a
President that routinely shot the bird at members of the press. And
this guy gets canned for a generic remark?
The White House
announced his resignation in an e-mail early yesterday. White House
Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, speaking on ABC’s “This Week,” said that
Obama thanked Jones for his service.
“Jones understood he was
going to get in the way,” Gibbs said. Jones, the author of a 2008 book,
“The Green Collar Economy,” decided “that the agenda of this president
was bigger than any one individual,” said Gibbs.
This has the
appearance of making a deal; the administration gets rid of Jones and
his attack dogs who are starting to take chunks of real meat out of
Glenn Beck’s backside and the Fox bottom line. Politics is a game but
money is serious business. Could this administration have made a deal
with the Fox devil? Would they be so naive as to think Fox could be
trusted to make a deal where you call off your dogs and we’ll call off
What other reason is left available to us? The president
has been accused of palling around with terrorists and of being a
communist, Hitler and Stalin, wanting to kill Grandma, and yet they now
throw Jones under the bus for “getting in the way?”
to high heaven, because the only real perceivable reason for Mr.
Jones’s termination was his lawful activity in calling for a boycott
against a racist moron who preaches nitwit theories and can’t even
spell the word oligarchy.
Yet now the damage is done. Was it
Rahm in the Situation Room with a knife in the back? Was it Mr. Murdoch
in the Boardroom with promises and candy?
Who now working on
the White House staff is comfortable planning to buy a home in
Washington when you watch your peers thrown to the wolves for imaginary
crimes? Who then will be willing to make principled stands when you
witness the nail that stood up and was immediately hammered down?
Hammered down either to cover an embarrassment or just cut into chum to
feed the Fox sharks.
Was it Barack in the White House with a
lack of courage? Can you shake hands with the devil and not get your
fingers burned? Can you lie down with dogs and not get fleas? For Jones
was fired and left with his nobility intact, while the administration
is left looking gamed and without a clue.
Ben Cohen is the editor and founder of The Daily Banter. He lives in Washington DC where he does podcasts, teaches Martial Arts, and tries to be a good father. He would be extremely disturbed if you took him too seriously.