Blog Queen Perez Hilton Gets a Beat Down

By Ben Cohen

Far too funny not to link to. From Chez Pazienza:

I almost wasn’t going to post anything about this, seeing as how any

publicity from any direction will only perpetuate the inexplicable

“nanoriety” of that idiot Perez Hilton. But man, if I don’t point and

laugh hysterically at this, I’ll seriously be neglecting my obligation

to make fun of those who truly deserve it.

By now I’m sure

you’ve all heard that Perez — née Mario Lavandeira, self-proclaimed

“Queen of Something-or-other” and sycophantic fame sponge — got his

ass kicked by a manager for the Black Eyed Peas at this weekend’s Much

Music Awards in Toronto after calling Will.i.am a “faggot.” You may

even know that rather than dialing, say, 911, he called for help via

Twitter (insert head-shake here) and has since posted a tearful, hissy-fittish response to the attack on YouTube, one that rivals Chris Crocker’s infamous “Leave Britney Alone” video for sheer self-serving hilarity…..

I’ll only say this: It’s a shame the Peas’ manager wasn’t carrying a baseball bat.

The idiot actually lives in my neighborhood, and I’ve seen him doing interviews on numerous occasions. Once, a car drove past in mid interview, and a guy yelled out ‘You fucking suck Perez!!!’. Spot on.

Ben Cohen is the editor and founder of The Daily Banter. He lives in Washington DC where he does podcasts, teaches Martial Arts, and tries to be a good father. He would be extremely disturbed if you took him too seriously.