Skip to main content

F*ck You, Mitch McConnell: The Sequel

McConnell's hypocrisy knows no bounds.
No, seriously, Fuck. You.

No, seriously, Fuck. You.

Seven months ago, The Daily Banter's Chez Pazienza marveled at the astonishing hypocrisy of Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell:

The unfathomable, breathtaking, staggering lack of even an ounce of shame you'd have to have to say, after Republicans had publicly looked for ways to not ever confirm a potential Hillary Clinton Supreme Court nominee, that fighting a Trump nominee is somehow beyond the pale. McConnell is one of the most loathsome creatures lurking the halls of Congress, but even despite his impressive history of bullshit double-talk and the belief that the end justifies the means (as long as the end is power) this is virgin territory for him.

It was a tour de force of pure cynicism but on Friday, McConnell managed to top his personal high-water mark for being a monumental scumbag. At about 2 am, the latest iteration of the GOP's assault on healthcare went down in flames. After weeks of literally hiding the incredibly unpopular bill from the public, the Democrats, and even most of his own party, McConnell knew just who to blame for his public humiliation:

Despite his party's inability to come together to pass through the legislation, McConnell pinned much of the fault on Senate Democrats."

Our friends on the other side decided early on they didn't want to engage with us in a serious way, a serious way to help those suffering under Obamacare," McConnell said.

It's hard to overstate how unbearably obnoxious this statement is. McConnell trampled on the entire concept of the Senate as a deliberative body by rushing his bill through in secret to the point where he had Republicans vote to open debate on it without actually knowing what was in the bill. At no point did McConnell allow the Democratic Party to participate in the process because he had no interest in their input. Blaming them is like blaming your skydiving instructor because you decided to jump without a parachute while he's screaming, "Put the fucking parachute on or you're gonna die, you idiot!"

But as Chez pointed out in January, McConnell is a shameless weasel of the highest order. He's well aware that any lie he tells, no matter how ridiculous, will be immediately picked up by Fox, AM Hate Radio, Drudge and Breitbart and amplified a thousandfold. By this time tomorrow, a majority of Republican voters will know, for a fact, that the Democrats are the obstructionists responsible for the failure of the GOP's repeal effort. In that bubble, McConnell and his fellow Republicans have been free to sell a bill that does the exact opposite of what they say it does and face absolutely no consequence from their voters.

That freedom from reality, however, does not necessarily translate into the ability to pass legislation in the real world.

We are now six months into the Trump administration and the GOP has zero legislative accomplishments. McConnell's lust for power has so badly damaged his own party that even with control of all three branches of the government, Republicans can't get anything done outside of repealing Obama's regulations and that only because they don't really need to vote on it.

In the end, being a miserable, lying rat bastard only gets you so far and Mitch McConnell will be remembered as the scheming asshole that destroyed the Republican Party. A fitting legacy for an amoral monster.

There are 466 days left to the 2018 elections.

- This article kills fascists

Please consider becoming a paid member of The Daily Banter and supporting us in holding the Trump administration to account. Your help is needed more than ever, and is greatly appreciated.