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Plans for President Trump’s gravesite at his Mar-a-Lago estate will involve an “eternal dumpster fire” designed to burn constantly in a manner similar to the John F. Kennedy Eternal Flame at Arlington National Cemetery. According to architect and longtime Trump associate Frank E. Sewalley, the president asked him to design “something beautiful and fitting that will stand the test of time.”

Sewalley noted that it is not unusual for people, especially older and wealthier individuals, to purchase gravestones and design mausoleums in anticipation of their deaths. “I’m not surprised he’s already thinking about it," said Sewalley. "Especially when you consider he's 70, has bad eating habits, and is averse to any physical activity that doesn’t involve a putter.” 

Sewalley, a 59-year-old Palm Beach resident who has designed numerous gravesites, said he had difficulty coming up with a design at first. “After some sleepless nights trying to conceptualize the design,” he recalled, “I suddenly remembered JFK’s Eternal Flame and asked myself, ‘How can I translate that wonderfully poignant idea into something that brilliantly embodies the presidency of Donald Trump?” 

He said a dumpster fire came to mind immediately.

“Once I thought of an Eternal Dumpster Fire, I knew I had a winner,” said Sewalley. “I mean, a good dumpster fire burns for a long time, and just when you think it’s about to die down it just keeps going. Maybe there’s an explosion from some aerosol cans in there or god knows what that keep it going, and suddenly you ask yourself, ‘How long can this dumpster fire go on?’ Well, when it comes to President Trump's memorial, the answer is ‘forever.’

Sewalley says designing the aesthetics of the gravesite was an easy task, but he still needs to figure out the best way to fuel the Eternal Dumpster Fire.

“Now, with Kennedy’s flame in Arlington they use propane,” he noted. “That could be an option here, but given how big this dumpster fire needs to be to do President Trump justice, that much gas could be unsafe. Plus, there’s just something unnatural about it. If I can figure out a way to fuel it with a never ending supply of real garbage, that’d be ideal."

Asked how the president reacted to the idea, Sewalley said at first Trump was “skeptical, but that he warmed to it after Sewalley assured him that the memorial would be “the most tremendous and beautiful dumpster fire in the world.”