Skip to main content

It's honestly close to impossible anymore to swallow the notion that Donald Trump actually wants to be president. At best, with each passing hour of the day it feels more and more like Trump is actively trying to destroy his own campaign, more than likely because he never expected he'd get this far to begin with and now he wants nothing more than to fuck off back to his garish penthouse and spend all his time lazily making money just being himself. You know, the way he did before he somehow became the Republican nominee for the highest office on the planet. The cauldron of surreal lunacy that perpetually swirls around the Trump campaign would be difficult to fathom were we not so used to it by now, with every 30-minute news cycle seeming to bring yet another bizarre statement, offensive tweet, or batshit moment from the rogues gallery of weirdo Trump sycophants. 

So with that in mind, maybe it's not really all that surprising that on Tuesday, during a campaign rally in North Carolina, Trump took the time to offer some kind words about -- Saddam Hussein. Apropos of nothing, because that's apparently Trump's linguistic default setting, Trump launched into a digression about the late Iraqi dictator in which he said, "Saddam Hussein was a bad guy, right? He was a bad guy. Really bad guy. But you know what he did well? He killed terrorists! He did that so good.” And why was Saddam supposedly "so good" at killing terrorists? Because he "didn’t read him the rights, they didn’t talk, they were terrorists, it was over.” First of all, take a moment to appreciate how Trump -- who claims to have "the best words" -- painfully mangles the English language in those two sentences. It's like he's Leonard from Memento and forgets what word he just said a split-second after he says it.

Beyond that is the obvious ridiculousness of claiming that Saddam Hussein was Allah's gift to terrorist killers, a statement Trump has actually made before. (Last October he said the world would be a better place if Saddam and Moammar Gadhafi were still in power.) This fits in neatly with the overarching theme of the Trump campaign and Trump's own worldview: that of an authoritarian who views dictatorships as inherently good things because power is power, whether it's used for benign purposes or not. Trump has made no bones about his respect and admiration for guys like Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong Un and, yes, Saddam Hussein, basically letting everyone know in no uncertain terms that were he to unthinkably achieve his supposed political goals he would preside over America's first strongman regime. 

It's taken no time at all for the conservative punditocracy to lose its collective fucking mind over Trump's latest foray into despot-worship. John Podhoretz called Trump "fucking insane" on Twitter. David French, meanwhile, pointed out that at one point Saddam tried to have the elder George Bush killed. And Amanda Carpenter was shocked at how Trump once again managed to screw up so royally a golden opportunity to score a hit against Hillary Clinton. Granted, none of these people matter to Trump or his legion of racist yokel supporters, but it once again goes to show just how far off the res he is in the view of the people who traditionally, you know, are the backbone of Republican politics in America. 

Trump doesn't know shit about shit. He doesn't understand global politics, foreign policy or world events and he doesn't care to learn, because, again, he's a fucking lazy ass. Couple that with his arrogance -- his insistence that not only does he know about such things, he understands them on a level far above everyone else -- and you have a recipe for a whole series of potentially catastrophic international incidents. Trump idolizes tyrants and is thoroughly ignorant of how world politics work; he's impulsive and completely confident in his decisions, no matter how wrong-headed; and he's thin-skinned and can easily be pushed to react in a rash and unpredictable manner. In other words, he's the kind of guy who would get into a shooting war with Belgium because that country's Prime Minister made a remark about his cartoon hair and spray tan. 

As for his comments about Saddam, well, they're obscene. But don't worry, by tomorrow we'll have forgotten them. Because that's the thing about Trump: You don't even have time to process one idiotic thing he's said or done before he's on to another completely idiotic thing.