Here's my favorite story of the day:

Piranha Attack: Dozens Hurt in Argentina

Dozens of people have been injured in a frenzied attack by a school of piranhas on an Argentinian beach...

More than 60 people were hurt in the Christmas Day attack, including seven children.

Among the wounded was a seven-year-old girl who suffered severe bites to her left hand, according to local newspaper La Capital.

The girl was taken to hospital where she had part of a finger amputated, the newspaper reported.

Most of the victims were bitten on the arms, feet and legs.

Paramedic Gustavo Centurion described the piranhas as "very aggressive".

And now, the punchline:

The attack occurred at a local beach on the banks of the Parana River, in the city of Rosario, central Argentina.

The Parana River.

That should make for a fun conversation with the insurance company.