So much for Trump taking the advice of various Republican A-listers demanding that the nominee show some discipline on the campaign trail. Speaking at a rally in Des Moines, Iowa, Trump delivered what could possibly be his biggest "I Know You Are But What Am I" quotes ever. Amid growing concerns that Trump is mentally unfit to be president, the Clown Dictator turned the tables and said the following about Hillary Clinton:
"She's really pretty close to unhinged," he said. "You've seen it, you've seen it a couple of times. The people in the background know it, the people that know her know it. And she's like an unbalanced person."
This is such a transparently obvious attempt by Trump to simply recycle the barrage of attacks against him -- redirecting the exact same line of attack against Hillary. Because if both candidates are "unhinged" and "unbalanced," then neither candidate is. Worse, you can expect his disciples to unironically parrot the same lines for the next few weeks.
The evidence against Trump, however, is incontrovertible. Here are some of his most inexplicably deranged quotes indicating a man who's, at best, nowhere near presidential, and, at worst, psychologically incapacitated.
- "I know words. I have the best words."
- “An ‘extremely credible source’ has called my office and told me that Barack Obama’s birth certificate is a fraud."
- “Ariana Huffington is unattractive, both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left her for a man – he made a good decision.”
- “You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young, and beautiful, piece of ass.”
- “I will build a great wall – and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me – and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words.”
- “When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending the best. They’re not sending you, they’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bring crime. They’re rapists… And some, I assume, are good people.”
- “Our great African-American President hasn’t exactly had a positive impact on the thugs who are so happily and openly destroying Baltimore.”
- “If I were running The View, I’d fire Rosie O’Donnell. I mean, I’d look at her right in that fat, ugly face of hers, I’d say ‘Rosie, you’re fired.’"
- "All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.”
- “One of they key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace. Good people don’t go into government.”
- “The beauty of me is that I’m very rich.”
- “It’s freezing and snowing in New York – we need global warming!”
- “I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”
- “My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well documented, are various other parts of my body.”
- “I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.”
- “I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I’m more honest and my women are more beautiful.”
- "The point is, you can never be too greedy."
- "My Twitter has become so powerful that I can actually make my enemies tell the truth.”
- "My IQ is one of the highest — and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure; it's not your fault."
- “I have so many fabulous friends who happen to be gay, but I am a traditionalist.”
- “The other candidates — they went in, they didn’t know the air conditioning didn’t work. They sweated like dogs...How are they gonna beat ISIS? I don’t think it’s gonna happen.”
- "Look at those hands, are they small hands? And, [Republican rival Marco Rubio] referred to my hands: 'If they're small, something else must be small.' I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee."
- "Lyin' Ted Cruz just used a picture of Melania from a shoot in his ad. Be careful, Lyin' Ted, or I will spill the beans on your wife!"
- “I was down there, and I watched our police and our firemen, down on 7-Eleven, down at the World Trade Center, right after it came down”
- "The only card [Hillary Clinton] has is the woman's card. She's got nothing else to offer and frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don't think she'd get 5 percent of the vote. The only thing she's got going is the woman's card, and the beautiful thing is, women don't like her."
- "Number one, I have great respect for women. I was the one that really broke the glass ceiling on behalf of women, more than anybody in the construction industry."
- “You could see there was blood coming out of [Megyn Kelly's] eyes. Blood coming out of her wherever.”
- “[McCain is] not a war hero. He was a war hero because he was captured. I like people who weren’t captured.”
- “Mr. Khan, who has never met me, has no right to stand in front of millions of people and claim I have never read the Constitution, (which is false) and say many other inaccurate things.”
- "Her running mate Tim Kaine, who by the way did a terrible job in New Jersey -- first act he did in New Jersey was ask for a $4 billion tax increase and he was not very popular in New Jersey and he still isn't." [Kaine is from Virginia.]
- “By the way, David Hinckley should not have been freed, OK? David Hinckley was just released." [The would-be Reagan assassin is John Hinckley, Jr.]
And finally, here's an actual Trump sentence that the readers at Slate are attempting to diagram:
- "Look, having nuclear—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart—you know, if you’re a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I'm one of the smartest people anywhere in the world—it’s true!—but when you're a conservative Republican they try—oh, do they do a number—that’s why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortune—you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we’re a little disadvantaged—but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me—it would have been so easy, and it’s not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what's going to happen and he was right—who would have thought?), but when you look at what's going on with the four prisoners—now it used to be three, now it’s four—but when it was three and even now, I would have said it's all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don't, they haven’t figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it’s gonna take them about another 150 years—but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us."
Hillary is unhinged and unbalanced? That might be the craziest thing Trump's ever said.
UPDATE: From my friend and super-talented editorial cartoonist Ed Hall: