You almost have to feel sorry for Mitt Romney, the loser who mostly thawed himself out of carbonite today to try and put the brakes on the Donald Trump train with scathingly sick burns like this:
I'm afraid that when it comes to foreign policy, he is very, very not smart.
What happened, Mitt, did Obama take your thesaurus, too? Bruce Vilanche could write a better line than that in an alcoholic coma.
So, after an hour of Romney trying to convince Republicans not to vote for Trump, but also not endorsing anyone else, Trump came along and popped the whole thing like a balloon. With all three cable networks holding air with a live shot of his empty podium for about half an hour, Trump finally emerged and put Romney down like a tormented car-roof-dog:
I could have said, Mitt, drop to your knees, he would have dropped to his knees
Trump is from New York, so he wasn't saying Mitt would be down there praying, trust me.
Now, anyone can make a crude crack about someone desperately dispensing a blowie, but Trump's talent is in matching that unfortunate image to something that really did happen. For example, when a desperate Romney practically jizzed himself while accepting Trump's endorsement in 2012:
What's more, this is yet another poetic comeuppance for a guy who relentlessly race-baited in 2012, and now fans himself because Trump is doing it better. Fuck Mitt Romney.