Conservative Asshat Chuck C. Johnson Doesn't Know How a Crime Scene Works

Chuck C. Johnson isn't the kind of pussy who worries about things like "caution tape" or "active crime scenes."
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Chuck C. Johnson isn't the kind of pussy who worries about things like "caution tape" or "active crime scenes."
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As news that far-right hatemongers Pamela Geller and Geert Wilders were the near-victims of an apparent assassination attempt in Garland, Texas during a "Draw Mohammed" event shot through the right-wing blogosphere, lesser bloggers merely wrote about it from homes or offices.

But those cowardly couch potatoes were given a lesson in journalism by super-sleuth Chuck C. Johnson, who knows that a real reporter goes right where the story is. No one tells him what to do! Here's the patented Got News three-step guide to investigative reporting:

Step 1: Announce that following police orders is for "pussies."

chuck 1

Step 2: Get kicked out of an active crime scene by the FBI.

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Step 3: Brag about it.

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Ha! A story broken wide open. Take that, liberal media.

Also, Chuck would like his loyal viewers to know that he would really like some more money for a better camera to use while possibly contaminating crime scenes. But for realsies, any cash this guy gets will probably eventually end up being used to pay his bail.