Here's The Only Way Ann Coulter Can Remain Relevant

Coulter is fast running out of tricks and her rapidly declining book sales is a strong indication that her reign of terror on the U.S. media is coming to an end. Here's the only way she can remain relevant, and it's pretty extreme even by her standards.
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Coulter is fast running out of tricks and her rapidly declining book sales is a strong indication that her reign of terror on the U.S. media is coming to an end. Here's the only way she can remain relevant, and it's pretty extreme even by her standards.
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In case you missed it, Ann Coulter was back at it again doing her best to enrage liberals with another incomprehensibly nasty attack on those least able to defend themselves. This time, Coulter directed her venom at a teenage girl who had escaped from crime ridden Honduras to come to America after her brother was murdered by a gang.

The girl was being interviewed by José Díaz-Balart’s on his new MSNBC show, and broke down when describing her harrowing journey to make it to the States, and the future she faced if forced to go back home.

Losing a brother because he refused to be in a gang and escaping the murder capital of the world to avoid the same fate would elicit a degree of sympathy from most feeling human beings, but not Coulter, who used the sad interview to go on a rant about illegal immigrants. She tweeted out:

Lovely.

However, this is kind of run of the mill stuff for Coulter, who has a history of invective so nasty it makes Bill O'Reilly look like Mother Teresa. As we've covered here before, Coulter is fast running out of tricks and her rapidly declining book sales is a strong indication that her reign of terror on the US media is coming to an end.

Perhaps I'm in a minority here, but there may be hope for Coulter yet. She isn't completely without talent, and I have it on good authority that her media persona is really just a big act. She's undoubtedly right wing, but above all, she's an expert attention seeker who used her combination of blond hair and shocking meanness to propel herself into the big leagues during a particularly vapid and contentious time in American media. As Matt Taibbi once wrote:

When you read Ann Coulter, you know you’re reading someone who would fuck a hippopotamus if she thought it would boost her Q rating. That’s a rare quality and it commands one’s attention.

Sadly for Ann, the public's attention is waning and she needs a new party trick to stay relevant in the fast moving industry she plies her trade in. Fucking hippopotami asides, there is something Coulter could do, and it would be more shocking than anything else she has done in her storied career.

Ann Coulter could become a liberal.

Think of the press she would get - the shock from both conservatives and liberals would keep her in the spotlight for days rather than minutes, and she'd get onto all the talk shows to explain why she turned away from advocating genocide against Muslims and arming unborn fetuses. She could write a book with a shocking title ("Sex Change: Why I Cut My Republican Genitals Off") and get back onto the New York Times best sellers list. Sure, she'd be pissing over all of her conservative allies and the fans she has acquired over the years, but think of all that attention! Some potential headlines from the future:

Ann Coulter defend Ed Snowden's latest NSA Leaks, Calls it "The Most Important Issue This Century"

Coulter Goes on Twitter Tirade Against Sean Hannity: "America's New Traitor"

Hillary Clinton's Latest Campaign Ally: Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter: "Obama the Greatest President Since Carter"

Who wouldn't click on those articles? Coulter doesn't have long to get her new act in gear, so I'd suggest planning to make the switch in time for the 2016 election - which really means the end of this year.

The clock is ticking Ann, time to order those Hillary bumper stickers.