Alex Jones Minion Dan Bidondi Is Now Running for Public Office... Seriously

The great thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office. The frightening thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office.
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The great thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office. The frightening thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office.
Screen Shot 2014-06-26 at 1.09.21 PM

The great thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office. The frightening thing about America is that almost anybody can run for public office.

Let's say you're somebody who once interrupted the question-and-answer portion of an important post-Boston Marathon bombing news conference with accusations that the whole thing was a "false flag" hoax; somebody who drives around in his car doing regular "truth" updates for the internet, which have in the past used biblical prophecy as a prism through which to dissect current events; somebody who once lamented on Facebook that he's not allowed to see his family anymore because he's instead chosen to devote his life to following Alex Jones and chasing chemtrails and the Illuminati; somebody who's basically illiterate and who pronounces the last name of the Israeli prime minister "NYA-n-hoo," rather than "net-an-YAH-hu"; somebody who once confronted a public official and was politely told to go fuck himself. You'd think some or all of this would preclude you from even being able to file the paperwork necessary to become a candidate for office, since you'd be laughed out of the room the second you walked in.

But alas, not everyone knows Dan Bidondi like we know Dan Bidondi.

Yes, it's with a giddy and grateful genuflection before the comedy gods that I bring you the news that Dan Bidondi -- InfoWars enforcer, unofficial Daily Banter mascot, and somehow perfectly round individual -- is running for state senate in his home state of Rhode Island.

Behold...

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"Providence" indeed, given that he made it with mere seconds to "spear."

Now certainly it would be easy to take this seriously and point out how terrifying the thought of someone who believes the utter beaver-shit insanity that Bidondi does being even a candidate for office. We've written more than a few times about the dangers the conspiracy theorist set pose when its views actually manage to infect and influence the realm of those who create public policy. But fuck it, the comedic value here is just too great to deny. This is oodles of terrific material potentially for the next five months, so there's no way I'm going to argue with that.

In fact, I'm going to go on record right now in saying that The Daily Banter officially endorses Dan Bidondi for the 16th district of the Rhode Island State Senate.

Bidondi '14: Yes We Kan