Yeah, But What If The Founding Fathers Were Alive Today? What Would They Think?
People often like to frame today’s issues through the eyes of America’s Founding Fathers, but if they were really alive today it would probably work more like this:
“What are these lighter than air metal beasts?”
“50 states, you say? But what of the Spanish and French settlements?”
“The exposed flesh of all these harlots is truly the devil’s work!”
“A horseless carriage? Surely this is witchcraft.”
“You let the hysterical women vote?”
“Zounds! The mail is delivered daily?”
“But the building is warm and I see no fireplace. How IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE?”
“Why are there so many Spaniards? And you allow them to vote as well?”
“You hold this tablet in your hand, and text is transmitted – through the ether? A MARVEL.”
“Why are all the blacks running around free?”
LESSON: Don’t do this, because it is dumb, and the Founders lived a long ass time ago and America is a better country now than we were then.