It's Tuesday morning everyone - time to find out what the hell is going on in the world. Here's what you need to know (at least until the afternoon):
1. Government Clusterfuck Created By America, Not Washington D.C
Media pundits and politicians specialize in turning politics into a subject only they only understand, and one of the ways they do that is by repeating meaningless catch phrases over and over again. Perhaps the best example of that is the "Washington can't get its act together" line - an awesomely hollow phrase used to deflect blame for gigantic fuck ups. Petula Dvorak has a great column in the Washington Post taking the media, and much of America to task for blaming Washington DC for the shutdown. Her point? The people in Washington creating the colossal cock up were sent there by the rest of the country.
2. Malcolm Gladwell Not So Cuddly
Everyone loves Malcolm Gladwell. The middle aged intellectual hipster made his name as a clever contrarian, churning out extremely well written books on things not being what they appear to be. He also made a huge amount of money shilling for the tobacco industry, big banks, and the pharmaceutical industry. So he deserves this hilarious takedown in the Guardian over his new book "David and Goliath":
The Guardian: David and Goliath by Malcolm Gladwell – digested read
3. No One Understands What The Hell The Republicans Are Doing
If you are struggling to understand why the Republicans are threatening to shut down the American (and therefore the global) economy over getting health insurance to poor people, don't worry. People who are very smart have no idea either. Andrew Sullivan has a crack at it in a must read essay on his site, and ends up with the rest of the nation. Completely clueless.
The Dish: There Is No There There
4. Man Needs Fire Brigade to Remove Penis From Toaster
Probably the best sentence I've ever read in the Mirror, one of Britain's crappest papers:
It is unclear exactly what the humiliated gentleman had been up to, but fortunately London's finest arrived to extricate his manhood from the electrical device.
The Mirror: Firefighters rescue man's penis from toaster
Happy Bantering people.