The Morning Banter: New iPhone(s), Kanye's Not Getting Faster Croissants, Arcade Fire's New Jam + More

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Let the agony of a long (and quite possibly slow) work week subside with this handy internet entertainment.  (Ps.  Happy Primary Election Day!)

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At an event later today, Apple is set to announce that not one but two new iPhones will hit the shelves.  The first will be a brand new model with a faster processor in the trademark aluminum casing, while the second will be a cheaper alternative made from plastic.  Let's see if this info from NYT holds true.

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The Association of French Bakers lodge a formal (and hilarious) complaint against Kanye West for his "Hurry Up With My Damn Croissants" request in his recent his song, "I Am A God."  Yes, this is totally real. And they bring up a good point -- Kanye, if you were a God, why can't you just mess with the time/space continuum to make 'em bake faster, hm?  Gotta love the French.

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One of the more compelling articles I've read in awhile, the Washington Post sits down with Inge-Brigitt Höss, daughter of infamous Nazi death-camp leader Rudolf Höss, who's been residing in the DC/Northern Virginia area since 1972.  The story goes on to paint a heartbreaking portrait of what it must have been like growing up in such a juxtaposition at Auschwitz and the terrible burden of having to keep it a secret all these years.

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With this handy dandy British Politeness chart, I now know how to properly interpret all of my boss, Ben Cohen's responses to the million and one questions I ask him daily.  (Don't mind the use of Benedict Cumberbatch as a fill-in photo for Ben.  That was purely intentional and totally selfish).

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Regardless of your opinion of David Bowie's recent album, get excited about his collaboration with Arcade Fire on their new single "Reflektor."  In keeping with what is becoming tradition for Arcade Fire, the official video is fiercely interactive and deserves a few minutes of play here. If you can't get down with the whole-screen preview, there's a youtube video directed by post-punk film/photography legend Anton Corbijn (who also happens to be pretty much my favorite ever since Control).  Have a listen: