Glenn Beck Loses His Voice and Still Manages to Spout Nonsense

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Ben Cohen
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Doctors informed the nation's favorite nut job Glenn Beck that his vocal chords have been temporarily paralyzed. The effects will "come and go," but thankfully it is a repairable condition, he explained through placards. So sad was Beck that he couldn't remind his audience about liberal baby killers and Obama's plot to destroy America that he went through an entire written monologue answering his own question: 'what is left to say, if today was the last day you had your voice'.

It turns out, Beck would say a lot about himself, promote his website, and remind everyone that America is doomed. Or in emoticon:

 :(