Madonna Believes Fans Trying to Steal Her DNA

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Ben Cohen
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Concert de Madonna à Paris Bercy, Août 2006

One of the reasons I left Los Angeles was the insane celebrity culture that I felt increasingly disconnected from as I got older. The idea that being famous was somehow virtuous and of national importance was always something I found silly, but after listening to horror story after horror story of egotistical actors/celebrities/musicians behaving incredibly badly, I started to actually hate it. Rather than live in a culture that celebrated it and become bitter and cynical, I decided to pack my bags and leave. I miss LA and my friends, but not the incessant attention to the lives of psychologically damaged attention seekers. Washington DC is far more my cup of tea - sure the principle players in this city are probably equally as insane (politicians are their own breed of nuts) but at least they are engaged in a process that actually means something.

Anyway, a story about Madonna caught my eye and brought back vivid memories of my years in La-La Land. I thought I'd heard it all, but this story really trumps the very best:

The music legend apparently orders workers to complete an extreme clean of all her dressing rooms on tour so that any hair, skin or saliva belonging to the 53-year-old cannot be captured.

Concert promoter Alvaro Ramos, who is overseeing the ­Portuguese leg of Madonna's MDNA tour, told Britain's Daily Mirror: "We have to take extreme care, like I have never seen for any other artist.

"We cannot even look at the dressing room after it is ready, or even open the door."

He added: "We can only enter after her sterilisation team has left the room. There will not be any of Madonna's DNA, any hair or anything. They will clean up ­everything. In the end, it is all to protect her and make her feel comfortable."

I'm not sure there is an appropriate response to this if it's true, because if it is, it's completely f#$%@ng insane.

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