Vatican Slams Avatar, Doesn't Want us to Worship Nature

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Ben Cohen
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Predictably, the Vatican has slammed the movie 'Avatar' for promoting worship of nature rather than worship of God. Fearing a return to paganism, it has criticized the James Cameron directed film for getting 'bogged down by a spiritualism linked to the worship of nature.'

Rather than believe we should obey laws of nature, the Catholic Church believes we should obey a bearded man in the sky who had a psychotic episode for 4000 years during which he massacred entire cities, eliminated various races, forbade us to have mildew in our houses and explicitly called for the stoning of adulterers and homosexuals. Then, he had a change of mind, sent down his only son to be born of a virgin in a stable somewhere in the Middle East who would turn out to be the savior of mankind - but only if everyone accepted he was actually the 'Son of God'. Otherwise, it was eternal hell along with all the other unfortunate Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs and Pagans who were unfortunately raised in the wrong religion.

Sounds like sound logic to me!

After all, worship of nature promotes silly things like saving the planet, creating a sustainable way of living, peace, harmony and an understanding that we cannot control the natural world. Not the type of thinking we should be promoting if you ask me.