Al-Cohol: America's #1 Terrorist

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Clearly, our focus on Al-Qaeda was misinformed. The enemy is not Al-Qaeda, but Al-Cohol.

John_belushi

S.F. Mayor Seeks Alcohol Counseling

Mayor Gavin Newsom said Monday that he plans to seek counseling for alcohol use, following the disclosure that he had an affair with the wife of a veteran aide.

Gavin Newsom is just the latest victim of the ever-powerful Alcohol sleeper cells infesting our nation on the shelves of supermarkets, convenience stores, and liquor stores (or "packy" stores in New England) from coast-to-coast. As we stand here right now, thousands of enemy alcohol agents are infecting Americans with their demon powers.

* Mel Gibson had rum turn him into a raving anti-semite!
* Lindsay Lohan was attacked by alcohol and it disrupted her film "work"
* Al-cohol agents are at the top of the suspect list for Isaiah Washington's latest bout of homophobia
* Miss USA turned into a skanky slut just after liquor touched her pouty lips
* Al-Cohol agents forced Mark Foley into a life of sin and lust

WAKE UP AMERICA. AL-COHOL MUST BE STOPPED.